Strange Visitors

Headquarters warned me strangers might be visiting my territory. I was warned to keep a keen eye out for spies eager to steal my secrets.

I was not at all surprised when visitors showed up a short while later. Of course I adopted a pleasant and friendly demeanor to allay suspicion.


I discretely observed all the new visitors. I immediately recognized Mr. Plod and Stumpy as spies. Mr. Plod appeared susceptible to my feminine whiles, so I invited him up to my budoir.


After a passionate encounter, evidenced by the disarrayed state of Mr. Plod's clothing (I managed to arrange for several pictures), he confessed his true purpose. He had been sent here to uncover the secrets of the magic toilet paper roll, but his love for me was too great. He could no longer suffer to deceive me.

Of course, having uncovered his original motive, I discarded him and turned my attention to Stumpy.


Discerning Stumpy's motives required a different approach, but after removing several of his appendages, he was willing to talk.


Mmmmmmm ... Stumpy feet!

Mr Bunny

A few new neighbors have made their way into my domain:


I've been watching them warily from a distance.



It's probably a good thing, as some of my current "playmates" have been getting a bit ragged. I'll have to spend some time lulling these newcomers into a false sense of security before ... well, you know.

Return to the Graveyard of Varla-ed Toys

Victim #7

It is with deep sorrow we announce the passing of Bandit 2


who apparently never saw it coming ...

Victim #8
and Moo Moo:


The people who live in my house had mentioned how good something called beef tastes, but it was only recently I discovered beef comes from cows. Of course, since I had easy access to a cow, I just had to try it out:


The little white fluffy pieces of beef are fun to play with, but so far I'm not really certain I would agree they taste that great. Maybe its an acquired taste?

Soccer Star

I feel very sorry for the less talented dogs out there. I recently discovered my athletic talents. Watch my fancy footwork as I practice my soccer moves:



Some LA team called me a few weeks back offering me a position on their team, but i had to turn them down and they were forced to go with their second choice instead.